Member-only story
11 Lessons I Learnt From My Failed Relationships
I have been in relationships in the past that ended in tears.
Some I shouldn’t have been in in the first place. I have also not been in one in more than five years. I haven’t been dating casually either. I decided to take some time off to know and build myself.
Now, I am looking to start dating again. Based on my failures and observations of the past, I have written down for myself my core guidelines into what I should consider moving forward and I have decided to share them in the event that someone out there may find them useful.
Here they are.
Friendship first
After a few failed relationships, I realised the value of forming friendships first before committing to romantic relationships.
Friendships are funny and goofy, less judgemental and more accepting. They are based on similarities. Sometimes they last a lifetime even if they may be ‘going nowhere’.
Relationships are based more on impressing, on building, on working on them. A relationship that builds up on a friendship is more solid in my estimation.
There you understand someone before you start creating and having your own expectations from them.
